{"title":"Are You Afraid of the . . .","description":"\u003cp\u003eA horror anthology for the chronically online and the existentially exhausted. This series riffs on the nostalgic fright of ‘90s kid TV, repackaging that eerie question—“Are you afraid of the dark?”—for modern neuroses. Each image lights a metaphorical match, illuminating today’s quietest terrors: body image spirals, social anxiety, productivity shame, and fear of being perceived. Fauxpamine dares to whisper what your inner monologue screams, just with better typography.\u003c\/p\u003e","products":[{"product_id":"are-you-afraid-of-the-carbs-tote-bag","title":"Are You Afraid of the CARBS? - Tote Bag","description":"Nothing haunts quite like a bagel in the wild. This piece explores the ridiculous moral panic around food, self-worth, and what it means to fear “carbs” more than chaos. 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This one’s for the overachievers, the burnout veterans, the gifted kids who grew up to dread emails. Expectation floats just out of frame, like a jump scare you can never quite prepare for. But you’ll smile through it. Obviously.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nSay goodbye to plastic, and bag your goodies in this organic cotton tote bag. There’s more than enough room for groceries, books, and anything in between.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n• 100% certified organic cotton 3\/1 twill\u003cbr\u003e\n• Fabric weight: 8 oz\/yd² (272 g\/m²)\u003cbr\u003e\n• Dimensions: 16″ × 14 ½″ × 5″ (40.6 cm × 35.6 cm × 12.7 cm)\u003cbr\u003e\n• Weight limit: 30 lbs (13.6 kg)\u003cbr\u003e\n• 1″ (2.5 cm) wide dual straps, 24.5″ (62.2 cm) length\u003cbr\u003e\n• Open main compartment\u003cbr\u003e\n• Blank product sourced from India","brand":"Fauxpamine","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47228671787247,"sku":"7083210_10457","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0765\/8818\/7887\/files\/eco-tote-bag-black-front-6926a88be6165.jpg?v=1764141213"},{"product_id":"are-you-afraid-of-the-monotony-tote-bag","title":"Are You Afraid of the MONOTONY? - Tote Bag","description":"It’s not the monster under your bed, it’s your calendar. This piece leans into the dread of routine, the suffocating repetition disguised as safety. The true terror? Realizing your \"cozy little life\" is on a loop.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nSay goodbye to plastic, and bag your goodies in this organic cotton tote bag. There’s more than enough room for groceries, books, and anything in between.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n• 100% certified organic cotton 3\/1 twill\u003cbr\u003e\n• Fabric weight: 8 oz\/yd² (272 g\/m²)\u003cbr\u003e\n• Dimensions: 16″ × 14 ½″ × 5″ (40.6 cm × 35.6 cm × 12.7 cm)\u003cbr\u003e\n• Weight limit: 30 lbs (13.6 kg)\u003cbr\u003e\n• 1″ (2.5 cm) wide dual straps, 24.5″ (62.2 cm) length\u003cbr\u003e\n• Open main compartment\u003cbr\u003e\n• Blank product sourced from India","brand":"Fauxpamine","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47228673458415,"sku":"4286062_10457","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0765\/8818\/7887\/files\/eco-tote-bag-black-front-6926a8c44dec1.jpg?v=1764141269"},{"product_id":"are-you-afraid-of-the-uncertainty-tote-bag","title":"Are You Afraid of the UNCERTAINTY? - Tote Bag","description":"The flicker of a candle in the void of What Comes Next. 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There’s more than enough room for groceries, books, and anything in between.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n• 100% certified organic cotton 3\/1 twill\u003cbr\u003e\n• Fabric weight: 8 oz\/yd² (272 g\/m²)\u003cbr\u003e\n• Dimensions: 16″ × 14 ½″ × 5″ (40.6 cm × 35.6 cm × 12.7 cm)\u003cbr\u003e\n• Weight limit: 30 lbs (13.6 kg)\u003cbr\u003e\n• 1″ (2.5 cm) wide dual straps, 24.5″ (62.2 cm) length\u003cbr\u003e\n• Open main compartment\u003cbr\u003e\n• Blank product sourced from India","brand":"Fauxpamine","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47228677587183,"sku":"1990617_10457","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0765\/8818\/7887\/files\/eco-tote-bag-black-front-6926a902f3b8d.jpg?v=1764141331"},{"product_id":"are-you-afraid-of-what-they-ll-say-tote-bag","title":"Are You Afraid of What They’ll SAY? - Tote Bag","description":"The final boss of self-expression: the lurking presence of Them. This piece burns bright with the social survival instinct, with every outfit, post, career pivot weighed against imagined committee feedback. And yet... it slays.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nSay goodbye to plastic, and bag your goodies in this organic cotton tote bag. There’s more than enough room for groceries, books, and anything in between.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n• 100% certified organic cotton 3\/1 twill\u003cbr\u003e\n• Fabric weight: 8 oz\/yd² (272 g\/m²)\u003cbr\u003e\n• Dimensions: 16″ × 14 ½″ × 5″ (40.6 cm × 35.6 cm × 12.7 cm)\u003cbr\u003e\n• Weight limit: 30 lbs (13.6 kg)\u003cbr\u003e\n• 1″ (2.5 cm) wide dual straps, 24.5″ (62.2 cm) length\u003cbr\u003e\n• Open main compartment\u003cbr\u003e\n• Blank product sourced from India","brand":"Fauxpamine","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47228680995055,"sku":"7686830_10457","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0765\/8818\/7887\/files\/eco-tote-bag-black-front-6926a9349b079.jpg?v=1764141383"},{"product_id":"are-you-afraid-of-the-carbs-sticker","title":"Are You Afraid of the CARBS? - Sticker","description":"\u003cp\u003eNothing haunts quite like a bagel in the wild. 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This one’s for the overachievers, the burnout veterans, the gifted kids who grew up to dread emails. Expectation floats just out of frame, like a jump scare you can never quite prepare for. But you’ll smile through it. 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