{"title":"I Docu, Bruh","description":"\u003cp\u003eIn I Docu, Bruh, Fauxpamine interrogates our fetishization of the documentary image, where charisma, collapse, and consumer redemption blur into spectacle. Through warped color, cult iconography, and tabloid hysteria, televised trauma is recast as a modern iconostasis: flat, luminous, and terrifyingly accessible. Each piece serves less as critique than artifact, reliquaries of performative belief in which healing curdles into simulacra and obsession becomes sacred commodity.\u003c\/p\u003e","products":[{"product_id":"i-cannot-fully-express-myself-as-an-artist-here-tote-bag","title":"I Cannot Fully Express Myself as an Artist Here - Tote Bag","description":"Rendered in fervent brushstroke and psilocybin tones, the figure of Tree, a self-declared seeker within the micro-utopia\/entropy spiral of The Garden, evokes both martyrdom and meme. The phrase, screamed at the edge of collapse, becomes a Renaissance-era lament distorted through livestream latency. Here, authenticity is aestheticized, and delusion elevated to doctrine.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nSay goodbye to plastic, and bag your goodies in this organic cotton tote bag. There’s more than enough room for groceries, books, and anything in between.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n• 100% certified organic cotton 3\/1 twill\u003cbr\u003e\n• Fabric weight: 8 oz\/yd² (272 g\/m²)\u003cbr\u003e\n• Dimensions: 16″ × 14 ½″ × 5″ (40.6 cm × 35.6 cm × 12.7 cm)\u003cbr\u003e\n• Weight limit: 30 lbs (13.6 kg)\u003cbr\u003e\n• 1″ (2.5 cm) wide dual straps, 24.5″ (62.2 cm) length\u003cbr\u003e\n• Open main compartment\u003cbr\u003e\n• Blank product sourced from India","brand":"Fauxpamine","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47219535642863,"sku":"2438398_10457","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0765\/8818\/7887\/files\/eco-tote-bag-black-front-6922ce8666fb1.jpg?v=1763888796"},{"product_id":"keep-sweet-bitches-tote-bag","title":"Keep Sweet, Bitches - Tote Bag","description":"Celestial kitsch is ruptured by theological gore. Righteous patriarchs bleed iconographically, while tiny demonic cherubs scramble like notes in the margins of a cracked Mormon doctrine. The clouds, reminiscent of '90s baptismal cards, are weaponized as backdrops for divine gaslighting. This is not satire, it is scripture redacted by rage.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nSay goodbye to plastic, and bag your goodies in this organic cotton tote bag. There’s more than enough room for groceries, books, and anything in between.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n• 100% certified organic cotton 3\/1 twill\u003cbr\u003e\n• Fabric weight: 8 oz\/yd² (272 g\/m²)\u003cbr\u003e\n• Dimensions: 16″ × 14 ½″ × 5″ (40.6 cm × 35.6 cm × 12.7 cm)\u003cbr\u003e\n• Weight limit: 30 lbs (13.6 kg)\u003cbr\u003e\n• 1″ (2.5 cm) wide dual straps, 24.5″ (62.2 cm) length\u003cbr\u003e\n• Open main compartment\u003cbr\u003e\n• Blank product sourced from India","brand":"Fauxpamine","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47219536232687,"sku":"1059501_10457","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0765\/8818\/7887\/files\/eco-tote-bag-black-front-6922ceca5e230.jpg?v=1763888857"},{"product_id":"ideas-as-revelations-tote-bag","title":"Ideas as Revelations - Tote Bag","description":"An icon in acrylic pixels. Koresh, rendered in beatific palette and painterly glitch, invites the viewer to rebrand madness as genius, charisma as gospel. The text is not suggestion.  It’s strategy. Fauxpamine posits that in a world obsessed with optics, divinity is just a marketing pivot away. Prophecy, it turns out, has good lighting.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nSay goodbye to plastic, and bag your goodies in this organic cotton tote bag. There’s more than enough room for groceries, books, and anything in between.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n• 100% certified organic cotton 3\/1 twill\u003cbr\u003e\n• Fabric weight: 8 oz\/yd² (272 g\/m²)\u003cbr\u003e\n• Dimensions: 16″ × 14 ½″ × 5″ (40.6 cm × 35.6 cm × 12.7 cm)\u003cbr\u003e\n• Weight limit: 30 lbs (13.6 kg)\u003cbr\u003e\n• 1″ (2.5 cm) wide dual straps, 24.5″ (62.2 cm) length\u003cbr\u003e\n• Open main compartment\u003cbr\u003e\n• Blank product sourced from India","brand":"Fauxpamine","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47219536658671,"sku":"8659846_10457","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0765\/8818\/7887\/files\/eco-tote-bag-black-front-6922cef6243af.jpg?v=1763888905"},{"product_id":"level-6-at-ivy-ridge-tote-bag","title":"Level 6 at Ivy Ridge - Tote Bag","description":"A proud proclamation of institutional erasure. This piece reverberates with faux-achievement energy, its marble background whispering faintly of psychiatric authority and carceral pride. The level system becomes both a ladder and a tombstone. Fauxpamine exposes the linguistic ballet of therapeutic authoritarianism, where healing sounds a lot like detention, and “future” is always just one level away.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nSay goodbye to plastic, and bag your goodies in this organic cotton tote bag. There’s more than enough room for groceries, books, and anything in between.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n• 100% certified organic cotton 3\/1 twill\u003cbr\u003e\n• Fabric weight: 8 oz\/yd² (272 g\/m²)\u003cbr\u003e\n• Dimensions: 16″ × 14 ½″ × 5″ (40.6 cm × 35.6 cm × 12.7 cm)\u003cbr\u003e\n• Weight limit: 30 lbs (13.6 kg)\u003cbr\u003e\n• 1″ (2.5 cm) wide dual straps, 24.5″ (62.2 cm) length\u003cbr\u003e\n• Open main compartment\u003cbr\u003e\n• Blank product sourced from India","brand":"Fauxpamine","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47219537576175,"sku":"7272038_10457","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0765\/8818\/7887\/files\/eco-tote-bag-black-front-6922cf3cddcd6.jpg?v=1763888976"},{"product_id":"mack-your-mark-tote-bag","title":"Mack Your Mark - Tote Bag","description":"A watercolor sanctum to the seductive promise of self-actualization, this piece enshrines the tragic hubris of multi-level transcendence. Allison Mack—here disembodied, deified—hovers like a branding archangel, her burnished legacy sealed in serif. The imagery nods to late-90s success-porn aesthetic while weaponizing the artisan’s plane as both altar and branding iron. You do not join; you are etched.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nSay goodbye to plastic, and bag your goodies in this organic cotton tote bag. There’s more than enough room for groceries, books, and anything in between.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n• 100% certified organic cotton 3\/1 twill\u003cbr\u003e\n• Fabric weight: 8 oz\/yd² (272 g\/m²)\u003cbr\u003e\n• Dimensions: 16″ × 14 ½″ × 5″ (40.6 cm × 35.6 cm × 12.7 cm)\u003cbr\u003e\n• Weight limit: 30 lbs (13.6 kg)\u003cbr\u003e\n• 1″ (2.5 cm) wide dual straps, 24.5″ (62.2 cm) length\u003cbr\u003e\n• Open main compartment\u003cbr\u003e\n• Blank product sourced from India","brand":"Fauxpamine","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47219573162223,"sku":"2623898_10457","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0765\/8818\/7887\/files\/eco-tote-bag-black-front-6922d79b93342.jpg?v=1763891123"},{"product_id":"mirror-mirror-tote-bag","title":"Mirror, Mirror - Tote Bag","description":"Fauxpamine presents a devotional farce, an altar to the algorithmic age’s newest mystics. The scene hums with counterfeit sanctity, two modern prophets framed by kitsch and conviction, prescribing transcendence through repetition. The presence of a silent queen, half oracle and half mirror, renders the act almost ecclesiastical. Here faith and fraud dissolve into one another, and salvation is merely a matter of lighting and belief.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nSay goodbye to plastic, and bag your goodies in this organic cotton tote bag. There’s more than enough room for groceries, books, and anything in between.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n• 100% certified organic cotton 3\/1 twill\u003cbr\u003e\n• Fabric weight: 8 oz\/yd² (272 g\/m²)\u003cbr\u003e\n• Dimensions: 16″ × 14 ½″ × 5″ (40.6 cm × 35.6 cm × 12.7 cm)\u003cbr\u003e\n• Weight limit: 30 lbs (13.6 kg)\u003cbr\u003e\n• 1″ (2.5 cm) wide dual straps, 24.5″ (62.2 cm) length\u003cbr\u003e\n• Open main compartment\u003cbr\u003e\n• Blank product sourced from India","brand":"Fauxpamine","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47219573719279,"sku":"5769069_10457","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0765\/8818\/7887\/files\/eco-tote-bag-black-front-6922d7cb4fa0f.jpg?v=1763891165"},{"product_id":"mrs-doubtfire-signed-off-on-it-tote-bag","title":"Mrs. Doubtfire signed off on it - Tote Bag","description":"A beautiful Amy Carlson, the deceased spiritual leader of Love Has Won, receives her own saintly transfiguration. Gently radiant, hands clasped in cosmic gratitude, she invokes a posthumous Robin Williams as both justification and gospel. The line, absurd in its warmth, becomes dogma for a theology built on pop culture necromancy. This is no longer a belief system, for it is now a fever dream canonized in soft light and sharper madness.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nSay goodbye to plastic, and bag your goodies in this organic cotton tote bag. There’s more than enough room for groceries, books, and anything in between.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n• 100% certified organic cotton 3\/1 twill\u003cbr\u003e\n• Fabric weight: 8 oz\/yd² (272 g\/m²)\u003cbr\u003e\n• Dimensions: 16″ × 14 ½″ × 5″ (40.6 cm × 35.6 cm × 12.7 cm)\u003cbr\u003e\n• Weight limit: 30 lbs (13.6 kg)\u003cbr\u003e\n• 1″ (2.5 cm) wide dual straps, 24.5″ (62.2 cm) length\u003cbr\u003e\n• Open main compartment\u003cbr\u003e\n• Blank product sourced from India","brand":"Fauxpamine","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47219574505711,"sku":"2649630_10457","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0765\/8818\/7887\/files\/eco-tote-bag-black-front-6922d8079948e.jpg?v=1763891225"},{"product_id":"take-care-of-yourself-and-your-privacy-settings-tote-bag","title":"Take Care of Yourself, and Your Privacy Settings - Tote Bag","description":"A televisual Pietà in mid-sermon. Springer’s monologue is reframed not as media commentary, but as sacred liturgy for the surveillance age. The audience, fragmented and semi-legible, becomes a mosaic of voyeuristic complicity. The text, sprawling and reverent, sanctifies the constructed self while damning its exposure. This is not just a warning.  It’s a eulogy for privacy.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nSay goodbye to plastic, and bag your goodies in this organic cotton tote bag. There’s more than enough room for groceries, books, and anything in between.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n• 100% certified organic cotton 3\/1 twill\u003cbr\u003e\n• Fabric weight: 8 oz\/yd² (272 g\/m²)\u003cbr\u003e\n• Dimensions: 16″ × 14 ½″ × 5″ (40.6 cm × 35.6 cm × 12.7 cm)\u003cbr\u003e\n• Weight limit: 30 lbs (13.6 kg)\u003cbr\u003e\n• 1″ (2.5 cm) wide dual straps, 24.5″ (62.2 cm) length\u003cbr\u003e\n• Open main compartment\u003cbr\u003e\n• Blank product sourced from India","brand":"Fauxpamine","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47219575324911,"sku":"2424422_10457","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0765\/8818\/7887\/files\/eco-tote-bag-black-front-6922d85482d6b.jpg?v=1763891305"},{"product_id":"seemed-like-a-good-idea-at-the-time-tote-bag","title":"Seemed like a Good Idea at the Time - Tote Bag","description":"A chiaroscuro ode to structural disintegration, this portrait of Jerry Springer immortalizes the moment a narrative swerves into entropy. The cigarette, the gaze, the throwaway line delivered with Shakespearean detachment all converge into an icon of televisual collapse. As the curator of his own circus, Springer becomes both ringleader and Greek chorus, bearing silent witness to the implosion of intention.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nSay goodbye to plastic, and bag your goodies in this organic cotton tote bag. There’s more than enough room for groceries, books, and anything in between.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n• 100% certified organic cotton 3\/1 twill\u003cbr\u003e\n• Fabric weight: 8 oz\/yd² (272 g\/m²)\u003cbr\u003e\n• Dimensions: 16″ × 14 ½″ × 5″ (40.6 cm × 35.6 cm × 12.7 cm)\u003cbr\u003e\n• Weight limit: 30 lbs (13.6 kg)\u003cbr\u003e\n• 1″ (2.5 cm) wide dual straps, 24.5″ (62.2 cm) length\u003cbr\u003e\n• Open main compartment\u003cbr\u003e\n• Blank product sourced from India","brand":"Fauxpamine","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47219576045807,"sku":"4252355_10457","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0765\/8818\/7887\/files\/eco-tote-bag-black-front-6922d88306ebf.jpg?v=1763891349"},{"product_id":"twin-flame-with-extra-cheeze-pleaseeeee-tote-bag","title":"Twin Flame with Extra Cheeze, pleaseeeee - Tote Bag","description":"Here, the domestic table becomes altar; pizza becomes eucharist. In Fauxpamine’s spectral rendering of the Twin Flames Universe, longing is rendered in euphoric gradient, and coercion is rebranded as spiritual ascension. The typography floats like prayer, while the subjects glow with algorithmic beatitude. What we see is not romance, but ritual, framed by the soft violence of metaphysical capitalism.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nSay goodbye to plastic, and bag your goodies in this organic cotton tote bag. There’s more than enough room for groceries, books, and anything in between.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n• 100% certified organic cotton 3\/1 twill\u003cbr\u003e\n• Fabric weight: 8 oz\/yd² (272 g\/m²)\u003cbr\u003e\n• Dimensions: 16″ × 14 ½″ × 5″ (40.6 cm × 35.6 cm × 12.7 cm)\u003cbr\u003e\n• Weight limit: 30 lbs (13.6 kg)\u003cbr\u003e\n• 1″ (2.5 cm) wide dual straps, 24.5″ (62.2 cm) length\u003cbr\u003e\n• Open main compartment\u003cbr\u003e\n• Blank product sourced from India","brand":"Fauxpamine","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47219576701167,"sku":"4467504_10457","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0765\/8818\/7887\/files\/eco-tote-bag-black-front-6922d8bc749f4.jpg?v=1763891407"},{"product_id":"talking-heads-cry-tote-bag","title":"Talking Heads Cry - Tote Bag","description":"Here watercolor whimsy collides with the macabre wish for posthumous recognition The text reads as both fantasy and elegy imagining one’s life reframed as serialized spectacle It indicts the culture of true crime consumption while simultaneously reveling in its aesthetic allure.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nSay goodbye to plastic, and bag your goodies in this organic cotton tote bag. There’s more than enough room for groceries, books, and anything in between.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n• 100% certified organic cotton 3\/1 twill\u003cbr\u003e\n• Fabric weight: 8 oz\/yd² (272 g\/m²)\u003cbr\u003e\n• Dimensions: 16″ × 14 ½″ × 5″ (40.6 cm × 35.6 cm × 12.7 cm)\u003cbr\u003e\n• Weight limit: 30 lbs (13.6 kg)\u003cbr\u003e\n• 1″ (2.5 cm) wide dual straps, 24.5″ (62.2 cm) length\u003cbr\u003e\n• Open main compartment\u003cbr\u003e\n• Blank product sourced from India","brand":"Fauxpamine","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47219577487599,"sku":"6311398_10457","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0765\/8818\/7887\/files\/eco-tote-bag-black-front-6922d8eea30b5.jpg?v=1763891457"},{"product_id":"take-a-chill-pill-would-ya-bruh-tote-bag","title":"Take a Chill Pill would ya bruh - Tote Bag","description":"Radiant decay wrapped in pharmaceutical optimism. Fauxpamine constructs a dystopian mascot, equal parts McDonald’s and Purdue Pharma, whose eyes track you across the frame like a sacred reliquary possessed. The floating OxyContin label functions as both halo and indictment. The trust is not earned; it is manufactured, coated in time-release glaze. The light is divine. The dosage is terminal.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nSay goodbye to plastic, and bag your goodies in this organic cotton tote bag. There’s more than enough room for groceries, books, and anything in between.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n• 100% certified organic cotton 3\/1 twill\u003cbr\u003e\n• Fabric weight: 8 oz\/yd² (272 g\/m²)\u003cbr\u003e\n• Dimensions: 16″ × 14 ½″ × 5″ (40.6 cm × 35.6 cm × 12.7 cm)\u003cbr\u003e\n• Weight limit: 30 lbs (13.6 kg)\u003cbr\u003e\n• 1″ (2.5 cm) wide dual straps, 24.5″ (62.2 cm) length\u003cbr\u003e\n• Open main compartment\u003cbr\u003e\n• Blank product sourced from India","brand":"Fauxpamine","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47219578503407,"sku":"4508807_10457","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0765\/8818\/7887\/files\/eco-tote-bag-black-front-6922d92e5ad9d.jpg?v=1763891522"},{"product_id":"i-cannot-fully-express-myself-as-an-artist-here-sticker","title":"I Cannot Fully Express Myself as an Artist Here - Sticker","description":"\u003cp\u003eRendered in fervent brushstroke and psilocybin tones, the figure of Tree, a self-declared seeker within the micro-utopia\/entropy spiral of The Garden, evokes both martyrdom and meme. The phrase, screamed at the edge of collapse, becomes a Renaissance-era lament distorted through livestream latency. Here, authenticity is aestheticized, and delusion elevated to doctrine.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eProduct features\u003cbr\u003e- Glossy, scratch-resistant paper finish for vivid color and smooth touch\u003cbr\u003e- Durable 100% vinyl with permanent acrylic adhesive for long-lasting hold on flat surfaces\u003cbr\u003e- Eco-solvent inks produce bright, fade-resistant colors\u003cbr\u003e- Available in white or transparent options and four sizes; kiss-cut for easy peel\u003cbr\u003e- Quick, bubble-free application (not waterproof); adult-only product\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eCare instructions\u003cbr\u003e- Use a soft, clean and dry cloth to gently brush any dust or dirt off from the center of the sticker outwards.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"3\" × 3\" \/ White","offer_id":47220990410991,"sku":"12657490693561962084","price":4.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"4\" × 4\" \/ White","offer_id":47220990443759,"sku":"31675965718224118096","price":5.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"6\" × 6\" \/ White","offer_id":47220990476527,"sku":"22844522685155216566","price":6.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0765\/8818\/7887\/files\/11770506101696253421_1200.jpg?v=1763956725"},{"product_id":"keep-sweet-bitches-sticker","title":"Keep Sweet, Bitches - Sticker","description":"\u003cp\u003eCelestial kitsch is ruptured by theological gore. Righteous patriarchs bleed iconographically, while tiny demonic cherubs scramble like notes in the margins of a cracked Mormon doctrine. The clouds, reminiscent of '90s baptismal cards, are weaponized as backdrops for divine gaslighting. This is not satire, it is scripture redacted by rage.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eProduct features\u003cbr\u003e- Glossy, scratch-resistant paper finish for vivid color and smooth touch\u003cbr\u003e- Durable 100% vinyl with permanent acrylic adhesive for long-lasting hold on flat surfaces\u003cbr\u003e- Eco-solvent inks produce bright, fade-resistant colors\u003cbr\u003e- Available in white or transparent options and four sizes; kiss-cut for easy peel\u003cbr\u003e- Quick, bubble-free application (not waterproof); adult-only product\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eCare instructions\u003cbr\u003e- Use a soft, clean and dry cloth to gently brush any dust or dirt off from the center of the sticker outwards.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"3\" × 3\" \/ White","offer_id":47221017182447,"sku":"18553110657465148258","price":4.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"4\" × 4\" \/ White","offer_id":47221017215215,"sku":"17984647844050933959","price":5.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"6\" × 6\" \/ White","offer_id":47221017247983,"sku":"11744227676265637372","price":6.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0765\/8818\/7887\/files\/11066666883750465092_1200.jpg?v=1763956796"},{"product_id":"ideas-as-revelations-sticker","title":"Ideas as Revelations - Sticker","description":"\u003cp\u003eAn icon in acrylic pixels. Koresh, rendered in beatific palette and painterly glitch, invites the viewer to rebrand madness as genius, charisma as gospel. The text is not suggestion.  It’s strategy. Fauxpamine posits that in a world obsessed with optics, divinity is just a marketing pivot away. 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